Well if I may begin at the beginning, this is me:
My name? Ben "Sex Demon" Thompson. Now I know what you're thinking about the middle name, and yes, ladies (and gents), it is indeed true. Every last bit.
|Sent her back into the fiery depths of hell all by myself. After the photo-shoot, mind.|
Where am I from? Guid auld Scotland. It's the place just above England, you know, where the queen goes on holiday sometimes. Home of strong, foul tasting booze, crazy nationalists and a cripplingly low average IQ.
|Need me to narrow that down a bit more?|
|That little guy's face means only one thing...|
|Fiona on the left, Rhona on the- goddamnit, where does she keep going?!|
|Pictured: My glorious reader.|
|Keep that needle away from me until I've sorted out the executors of my estate.|